- It is a serious problem that crosses all socio and economic lines. The estimated one-in-four U.S. children who are exposed to a family alcohol problem come from all ethnic groups, at all economic levels, and in urban, suburban, and rural communities.
During Children of Alcoholics Week, observed each year during February, individuals and organizations that touch the lives of children every day, including those at the Saint Barnabas Behavioral Health Center, work to encourage others to help break through barriers of shame, silence, and isolation to support these children.
According to Maher Awad, MD, Chief of Staff at the Saint Barnabas Behavioral Health Center (SBBHC), where he is also a psychiatrist on staff, studies show that children in families affected by alcohol abuse are at increased risk for physical illness and injury, emotional disturbances, educational deficits, behavior problems, and susceptibility to alcoholism or alcohol abuse in later life.
“In extreme cases, they face physical abuse or neglect,” Dr. Awad says, “but more often, they experience emotional trauma or shame at their parent's condition, confusion due to the family's denial that a problem exists, or a sense that they are somehow to blame.”
However, many people do not realize that some of the most serious harm from this addiction is indirect and hidden. Seventy percent of these children will try to hide the problem from the outside world, Dr. Awad observes. “They are often frightened and in despair, with no one to turn to for help and support.”
Although the child tries to keep the alcoholism a secret, teachers, relatives or other adults may sense that something is wrong, he notes. A child may open up to someone who comes into contact with him or her on a daily basis, like a teacher, coach, religious leader, or a physician or nurse. “This person needs to be able to respond appropriately and refer the child for help,” says Dr. Awad.
The following behaviors may signal a drinking or other problem at home:
• Depression or suicidal thoughts
• Failure in school
• Withdrawal from classmates or aggression towards other children
• Delinquent or risk-taking behavior
• Frequent physical ailments, such as headaches or stomachaches
• Abuse of drugs or alcohol
“Some children feel responsible for their parents drinking. They feel that they are the problem, and are responsible for the arguments, the violence, the stress and anxiety that characterize family homes where one or both parents drink too much,” states Dr. Awad.
Children of alcoholics may also act like responsible "parents" within the family and may cope with the alcoholism by becoming controlled overachievers throughout school, while being emotionally isolated from other children and teachers. Their emotional problems may show only when they become adults.
“It’s important to note that not all children of alcoholics have identical experiences. Some people grow up with a parent who is a violent, obnoxious drunk. Others grow up with quiet, closet drinkers,” Dr. Awad says.
Since alcoholism runs in families, one of the greatest risk factors for developing alcoholism is to be the son, daughter, or sibling of an alcoholic. If they drink, studies show that children of alcoholics are four to nine times more likely to develop severe alcohol problems than others.
But there is hope, Dr. Awad states. “These children and adolescents can benefit from educational programs and mutual-help groups,” he says, including programs for children of alcoholics, Al-Anon, and Alateen. “Early professional help is also important in preventing more serious problems for the child, including alcoholism. It can also help the child to understand they are not responsible for the drinking problems of their parents.”
The treatment program may include group therapy with other youngsters, which reduces the isolation of being a child of an alcoholic. Mental health professionals will often work with the entire family, particularly when the alcoholic parent has stopped drinking, to help them develop healthier ways of relating to one another.
“There is no magic solution, but with intervention you can shift the odds to the healthy side,” Dr. Awad says.
Saint Barnabas Behavioral Health Center, along with Kimball Behavioral Health Services, is a 100-bed mental health and chemical dependency treatment facility providing inpatient, partial hospitalization and outpatient services for adults and older adults.
For more information on psychiatric services or to schedule an appointment with the Saint Barnabas Behavioral Health Center, call 800-300-0628.
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